Is that all there is?
by HallowRain8587
Summary: An aging witch contemplates her life and what there is left for her.


JKR owns the recognizable characters.

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Is This All There Is?

She sat looking out the window of the small cottage watching the traffic move slowly down the road. A car, a lorry, another car. The sun was setting in the west and the sky was a pale blue with lemonade-colored clouds. The trees were dark ink streaks on the horizon. The autumn chill was in the air and the dried leaves were brown in the crisp shards of yellow grass. Overhead she could hear the geese heading southward. Winter was on its way. The wind blew stronger and the day grew shorter. The whole scene fit her melancholy mood. Her children were grown and had moved out. They had children and some of those children had children. She didn't feel old enough to be a great-grandmother, but she felt older than time itself. Her husband was dead. The passion that they shared had died long before he had. Maybe she had never been in love with him. Who knows. She loved him. She respected him, but there was really no passion. They had married because it was the thing to do. They had children because it was the thing to do. When he couldn't work she did because it was the thing to do. She had even taken her children back into her home with their children then sent them back into the world able to support themselves because it was the thing to do. Now she was supporting a grandson because he was not being nurtured at home. She had gotten him through his schooling and he had been working for a year. He was now ready to go out on his own and that was good. It was the thing to do. But what about her? What did she want? What was next? There was nothing to do.

The clouds became a vibrant orange as the sun, that brilliant red globe, sunk slowly beneath the horizon. What was a sixty-eight year-old widow to do with the rest of her life. The work she loved would go on without her, she had retired and they outsourced it. The friends she had were all working. Her children had lives of their own. They were working. The grandchildren were working or going to school. Even her great-grandchildren had lives to live, schools to attend, friends to play with. When had she become redundant.

They said you could go to a matchmaker and find someone your age to hook-up with. That sounded like too much work. Anyone her age would have at least as much baggage as she did. How could she tell a stranger that she was lonely and wanted to have sex just one more time in her life? Come to think of it, it had been nearly forty years since the last time. Did that make her a virgin since she had lived longer since the last time than it was until the first time? Why would she want an old man? He would just look at her wrinkles, sagging boobs and stretch marks and know that she was old. He would just go date a sweet, young thing with smooth skin and perky breasts. Men could do that, but women her age could not. The world was full of double standards.

The sky was darkening and the clouds were now purple. The cars on the road had turned on their headlights in order to navigate the coming darkness. The loneliness enveloped her like a blanket. No, it was like a warm comforter full of eider down. The night was not a time of loneliness, but a time of hope and reflection. She would rest and awaken with a new purpose. She had always wanted to travel, but he had never wanted to do so. A cruise! Every time she said she wanted to take a cruise, he would say that it was crazy. She would go to foreign lands and learn their history from tour guides. She would enroll in adult education classes and learn to speak Welsh. She always wanted to do that. She would go to London and ride the tube and then a red double-decker bus. He said that was crazy for a witch to do. She would go to see the art galleries where the muggles had pictures that didn't move and some that didn't look like anything. She would go to the ballet and symphony. Hermione might go with her. Hermione liked to do that. She would go to a spa and have a massage, then a manicure and pedicure. She hadn't done that before either. She would take Ginny and they could just talk and giggle. She would make a bucket list with a 100 things to do this year and then start on the one for next.


End file.
